Skip to main content

Til Death...That's a Long Time : Marriage

Recently, I had the pleasure of witnessing a close family member tie the knot, jump the broom, take the plunge, etc. I have to admit that a part of me watched her grin and spin in her dress, dance, laugh and enjoy her day and I felt as if I were watching a documentary. On my wedding day I was 5 months pregnant, the groom was late, I was in the courthouse and I paid for the entire thing. We didn't even have rings. So as you can imagine, watching a woman totally enjoy her special day was a joy to see but also quite strange. I wonder how someone reaches that point of happiness when it comes to relationships? Now this couple has had their fair share of ups and downs. I've witnessed it. I was surprised they made it the altar. This isn't to speak negatively about their relationship. I'm often surprised anyone makes it the the altar these days. However, when the big day came there was nothing but joy for the both of them. The happiness they felt toward each other was palpable to all who bore witness to it. They were madly in love...for the wedding. So what happens after? I dont know. Some people remain in love, some people claim to fall out of it. Some people have highs and lows. I know that when I got married my love for my husband was like a mountain top. I started at just about nothing, climbed my way up high and then was sent tumbling back to the ground. Watching close friends and family in loving relationships always feels like an education rather than an interaction. I like being the observer. I have little desire to create my own relationship. The thought of a functional marriage is a welcomed one but the faith that one exists is non-existent. I watch my loved ones and have the highest hope for their success but I can't help but wonder if they will meet the same failure that I once did. I wish I could just say I am negative but statistics support that I am a realist. The divorce rate is quite high. It probably always was high. Maybe years ago people didnt divorce but just became estranged. Now people want to move on and be able to attempt the fairy tale that failed. So if someone divorces and marries in a three year span, what does that do the statistics? Marriage is meant to last until death. However people don't seem to make that stop them from leaving a marriage that seems to be squeezing the life out of them (myself included). Whether or not my friends make it it or fail, the happiness they felt for that day should be worth it. Knowing that on my wedding day, all I felt was sheer aggravation let's me realize that people can be happy ...and married. Let's just hope they die that way.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

And I Am Telling You... Breaking Up Is Hard To Do!

Dreamgirls was a successful Broadway play for years. It even made it's way to the big screen in 2006. Original headliners of the staged version included then little known Loretta Divine and now long forgotten Jennifer Holliday. Watching the performance of the then robust and popular Holliday allowed me to witness her successful portrayal of the scorned character Effie White. In a passionate performance she screamed, sobbed and belted the lyrics of "And I Am Telling You, I'm Not Going" in such a way that years later many have made a valiant effort to match her vocal bravado in singing the same song. Of those attempts, most have fallen far from the mark. With this knowledge, I wondered why was it that Jennifer Hollidays career didn't move much further beyond her Dreamgirls fame. Upon doing a bit of google research ( not the most reliable, but definitely the most convenient) I have found several theories as to why Jennifer Holiday's career came to a standstill...
Post a Comment
Read more

Good Morning Heartache....

When I was about 14 my mother gave me a book called "Good Morning Holy Spirit". It was a Christian book that was aimed to keep believers in tune with God. It encouraged the reader to wake up each morning and greet God, allowing Him to play a role in your life each day. I still try to do that. Recently, I realized that another part of my life that I can certainly do without is heartache. Getting married and going through the motions of a divorce gives way to feelings that are far from pleasant. It's stressful, it's emotionally draining and it hurts like the dickens. With all of these aches and pains I still press on with my decision to end my marriage. My husband understands. For the first time last night, I poured my heart out to him, sobbed and expressed my pain. I told him that I loved him, but I could never be with him again. I admitted that I don't know how to be his wife. I admitted that I am petrified of being a single parent to two girls. I mourn...
2 comments
Read more

K-Ci & Jo-Jo Come Clean.... : REVIEW

When I heard that K-Ci and Jo-Jo were coming out with a reality show documenting their experience going through rehab, I was excited. The first thing I wanted to know was which one was K-Ci and which one was Jo-Jo (yes, it has been that long since I have seen let alone heard of them since highschool). I always loved Jodeci and when the two lead singers of the group branched off and made a few ballads I looked forward to hearing more, but more never came. Years passed by and I continued to play their hits and came to terms with the fact that this group was never going to reunite and the two brothers whose vocals lead the group to super stardom with were coked up and out for the count. Enter K-Ci and Jo-Jo: Coming Clean. I figured they were going to finally boot the snow blizzard that packed their nostrils. WRONG. They are kicking the alcohol habit. They claim that there was never a drug problem. We all have heard otherwise, but they insist. If moscato can turn me into what these t...
9 comments
Read more