I won't say that learning navigate an entirely new hair texture doesn't come with it's fair share of challenges. I will say that so many of us don't want to deal with our hair once it's restored to its original texture.
I have to admit that I have been one of the women that I used to tsk at years ago. I always have in hair extensions by way of weave, braids or crocheted something. I say that I am doing a protective style which is sometimes true but most times I am just trying not to do my hair at all. I don't want to bother to manipulate my hair into elaborate twist outs and take time to do intricate braids. Here's the thing: why can't I just wear my hair as is? Why do I have to do a wash and go every morning? Why do I feel the need to have twist outs and faux hawks? Why can't I just wear my hair out like most other women do (and by other women, I mean White ones). White women wear their hair out or in a ponytail almost every day. Seldom do they have something interested going on with their hair. I understand that braids are a part of my culture however that doesn't mean that I have to do it all the time. I can wear my hair out. I can go to the investment firm I work in with a dope puffy fro WITH NO HEADBAND and no gel and just keep it moving along.
I remember chatting with a White woman and she had very frizzy hair. I asked what products she used and she said "I'm over it. I have frizzy hair. It's clean, it's just frizzy." At the time I felt badly for her because she hadn't learn to "tame" her hair. Now I fell badly for my ignorant arse thinking she had to tame it. I have to get better at accepting what is before me. It's okay to dress something up now and again but I'm interesting in accepting who I am before the lip gloss, stilettos, and edge tamer.
I used to rock an afro with pride but I had colored bands to go around my head and I was always accessorizing it. The older I get the less I care about any of that. I have chronic headaches and headbands are not going to work for me anymore. They also eat the edges of my hair.
Now I get single strand knots from my hair coiling onto itself and I get tempted to do yet another protective style that protects nothing because my edges suffer from those too.
Realizing all of this, I have decided to wear my hair in its natural state for 30 days. I am not putting any extensions in my hair. I am not wearing a wig, crochet braids, weave or braided extensions. I'm going to wear my hair with oil and water. That's it. No gels, foams, or sprays. It's going to be me, Shea Butter and Black Castor Oil and H20. I'm going to learn how to work with MY hair without the overpriced products and "protective style" alibi. I'm going to be me for 30 days strong.
So when I walk into the office in my super corporate attire with a afro the size of Africa I am going to enjoy the stares and the comments and the questions because it will be an opportunity for education. I was a woman that didn't accept myself as is. There are far too many women who don't accept themselves as is. We squeeze into girdles, we contour away our perceived flaws, we wear heels slim our ankles, we wear gobs of gel or extensions so not to "deal" with what lies beneath it all. That's a woman thing, not a race thing. We are who we are. We carry the traits of our ancestors and we all should embrace it and be proud. If you want to change it up, let it be a preference not a necessity. I'm a Black woman, I have an afro. The end.
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