Losing It: The Ballad Of Steven Slater

There once was a man who did what he can

if you needed a hand, he'd lend it

but there came a day where he had a few expletives to say

this is a ballad about Steven Slater the Flight Attendant

See Steven was a guy who'd often try

to get the passengers seated

but there was a lady on board moving on her own accord

and her lack of action made poor Stevie quite heated

So being committed to his career of six or seven plus years

Steven tried to put her in her place

but this here lady drove little Steven crazy

when her bag knocked him square in the face

See Steven after taking a bit of beating realized

he's not so tough

so he went to the intercom said some words that would shame his mom

and basically said he had enough

and after his tirade on that plane, he said that he finally quit

but not before he opened the emergency door

and slid right out of it

What made Stevie snap, we'll never know

but one thing is certainly clear

Steven made sure that that before he'd go

he wasn't leaving without his beer.

And so that night, all seemed right

as his day was unlike any other

and a happy Steven Slater fell fast asleep

in the arms of his masculine lover.

And so ends the ballad of Steven Slater

the flight attendant who it seems had lost his mind

so tired of work, he cursed out the jerks

and most of us aren't far behind.

So I understand the anger of that man

who was trying to do his work

take this lesson and you'll find a blessing

that sometimes you just have to curse out those jerks.