Thinking Kinky : The Nappy Haired Diva

Today at work, a man was leaving the building and told me "stay beautiful". Usually, when a man says that I assume he is giving me a compliment but today I took it another way. After a break up, a break down, and a build up in progress, "stay beautiful" means so much more to me. A bad romance can kill your confidence. Weight gain can kill your self esteem. Working long hours can kill your social life. Here I was, a complete mess. I felt  ugly and if my outside reflected what I felt within, I looked ugly too. Then, he told me to stay beautiful and it all suddenly made sense. Staying beautiful isn't just a compliment a man or woman casually tosses your way. It's an action. Staying power isn't easy. We often see celebrities, whose foundation of fame and fortune often started off with a "look" long before it ended with talent (if at all). That's when the plastic surgery commences. We see the nips and tucks and eventually the disfigured faces...

I think the best way to start this off is to give you an understanding of my relationship with food. First, we have a relationship. That should say something. The healthy person eats to live, and I live to eat. photo courtesy of www.grandparents.com I'm not sure how it all started honestly. My memory only goes back to about age 4 and at that time, I wasn't conscious of much of anything. I didn't think about my body. I hadn't compared it to anyone else. I was just as clueless about food. I never thought of eating too much or too little. I don't recall being hungry at that age. I just remember being fed. I was a picky eater. Cold cuts made me nauseous. A hot egg sandwich could be ingested but if you tossed a hot drink in the mix (like tea or cocoa), I was tossing cookies. If my dinner had too many ingredients, I picked around it. My mom was always one green pepper or onion slice away from ruining my meal. The only thing I ate to the last drop without fail was pi...