Thinking Kinky : The Nappy Haired Diva

A few blogs ago, I was giving my prospective on Co-Parenting. Yesterday, my sister politely informed me that I am not co-parenting at all. Here's how she came to that conclusion: As I may have mentioned before, since about July I have been working a part-time job in addition to my full time job and because of this I work 7 days a week. My part-time job is in Washington, DC which is about 1 hour away from my home. Instead of doing a total of 4 hours in commute time and gas mileage each weekend, I instead round up my daughters and crash at my mothers home which is 30 minutes away from my job saving me gas and time. The girl's father lives about two minutes away from my mothers house so naturally once the girls are in the neighborhood they want to see their Dad. Two weeks ago, he made arrangments to see them and came to pick them up about an hour after he said he would. The girls sat dressed staring out the window until he finally arrived. The following day he said that

"I feel empty." I said this with finality. I wanted him to know that I didn't plan on improving. "I am empty." I offered this immediately. I wanted him to understand that there was no changing my state of well being or lack thereof. This was a confirmation. He reclined in his cheap office chair. He always crossed his right leg neatly over his left and I always wondered how a man could do such a thing without posing a threat to his genitals. I then allowed my eyes to drift and gaze upon his crotch, pondering the placement of his genitals in the make-shift vice created by his crossed legs. He shifted slightly in his chair, obviously in response to my shameless ogling. "Why do you say that?" He exhaled. He always seemed bored with our sessions. Perhaps I wasn't insane enough to be exciting. "Its what I know to be true." This came on purpose. I wanted him to understand that he can't change what I know. He can only influence what I thi

I was in an abusive relationship for about at least nine years. I was emotionally abused, I was financially taken for granted, and there were other types of abuse that I prefer not to elaborate on. The bottom line is that I was in a relationship that put me in a dark place and I became quite comfortable with the pain that I constantly endured. He was the first man I had ever fallen in love with and I didn't know anything else. I functioned within the dysfunction and while I knew things were not "right" I still stayed. Eventually it had nothing to do with love but much more to do with habit. Then- I ended it all. Each man I have met and dated since has been a better fit for me than the man before him. Each man I have met and dated since has shown me what it is that I deserve and has given me a glimpse of what happiness within a relationship can be like. Recently I met someone that has been a ray of light in my life. He is smart, he is attentive, hard-working, sweet,

I did turkey bacon and sunny side up eggs again for breakfast. I think the toughest thing with this is going to be able to create interesting dishes outside of the the usual. Lunch is going to be a chipotle chicken and steak salad. Dinner? not so sure yet. I havent bothered to weigh in, it would be stupid to do that as I havent even been at this for a week. My mood: I'm peeved but thats common for me so I can't blame it on the changes. My energy: pretty good for a Thursday. I can say that I got 7 hours sleep last night and between that and the new guy I have been seeing, I am a happy camper most days. So thats my eating in a nutshell. I am changing my diet, but I am also trying to change my life. This all starts within and hopefully the results will reflect on the outside. Peace and love!

February marks my 32nd birthday and I am not stepping further into my 30's out of shape. I was exercising plenty over the summer but financial woes caused me to step away and work a PT gig in addition to my FT gig (a seven day work week). The last time I tried to work out, my body began to shake and I collapsed on the couch. Basically, too much work, too little sleep= no working out for me. HOWEVER, there is no better time to eat healthy. If I can't work out I need to pay close attention to what goes in since I can't work it off. Today starts my hard core low carbing section of my blog. Breakfast: 4 Turkey Bacon Strips and 3 sunny side up eggs. Lunch: salad topped with warm grilled chicken (a drop of dressing) Dinner: Chicken legs and asparagus I will do weigh ins each week. The goal? 15lbs down by Feb. God help me over the holidays. -Thinking Slimmer.