Recently, I had the pleasure of witnessing a close family member tie the knot, jump the broom, take the plunge, etc. I have to admit that a part of me watched her grin and spin in her dress, dance, laugh and enjoy her day and I felt as if I were watching a documentary. On my wedding day I was 5 months pregnant, the groom was late, I was in the courthouse and I paid for the entire thing. We didn't even have rings. So as you can imagine, watching a woman totally enjoy her special day was a joy to see but also quite strange. I wonder how someone reaches that point of happiness when it comes to relationships? Now this couple has had their fair share of ups and downs. I've witnessed it. I was surprised they made it the altar. This isn't to speak negatively about their relationship. I'm often surprised anyone makes it the the altar these days. However, when the big day came there was nothing but joy for the both of them. The happiness they felt toward each other was palpable to all who bore witness to it. They were madly in love...for the wedding. So what happens after? I dont know. Some people remain in love, some people claim to fall out of it. Some people have highs and lows. I know that when I got married my love for my husband was like a mountain top. I started at just about nothing, climbed my way up high and then was sent tumbling back to the ground. Watching close friends and family in loving relationships always feels like an education rather than an interaction. I like being the observer. I have little desire to create my own relationship. The thought of a functional marriage is a welcomed one but the faith that one exists is non-existent. I watch my loved ones and have the highest hope for their success but I can't help but wonder if they will meet the same failure that I once did. I wish I could just say I am negative but statistics support that I am a realist. The divorce rate is quite high. It probably always was high. Maybe years ago people didnt divorce but just became estranged. Now people want to move on and be able to attempt the fairy tale that failed. So if someone divorces and marries in a three year span, what does that do the statistics? Marriage is meant to last until death. However people don't seem to make that stop them from leaving a marriage that seems to be squeezing the life out of them (myself included). Whether or not my friends make it it or fail, the happiness they felt for that day should be worth it. Knowing that on my wedding day, all I felt was sheer aggravation let's me realize that people can be happy ...and married. Let's just hope they die that way.
I was lying in bed when I heard the familiar chime of an incoming text. Opening one eye, I opened the message to see two letters: GM. Still, in the stupor that slumber often puts you in, I scanned my brain to register the meaning...ah yes...Good Morning. I clumsily keyed in "Hey" and hit the send button. I kept my face deep in my pillow listening for another chime. Nothing. I switched my phone into silent mode and caught another hour of sleep before waking up again. This is a typical day in the life of a serial texter. I text a lot. I text because it's free (on my cell plan). I text because it's convenient. I text because it's a great way to have a conversation without actually having a conversation. But what happens when you actually WANT to speak to the other person with whom you are texting? How do you break the pattern? After months of texting, a phone call may prove to be awkward and break the momentum you built through texting! This has happened
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