Free *A Poem*

I have a confession
or maybe a lesson
but since people are addicted to 'feel good'
I'll just call this my blessing.
Today I had to decide to provide you
with reality.
Reality is what is and not whats expected
Reality is what is and can not be rejected
The reality I am about serve you will likely
not
be accepted
easily.
In fact you may be insulted, perhaps
even revolted by this
but I'd be remiss if I didn't kiss your
Judas face with this
blessing.
For years I have cared and loved you
despite your flaws, and undeclared wars
I have loved you
Because of this love others have inherited its benefits
greedily consumed with no end to it
family with no friend in it
receiving but seldom sending it.
I have lived my early years as an eager dog craving for a bone
and with each one thrown
I was content
but
I have spent recent years demanding a meal
a love I can respect
with a reciprocity I
can
feel
the wounds you have borrowed into my flesh
seem far too deep to heal
and as I play over the decades of events
I want nothing more than to do away with the reel.
I can't heal myself
so at the moment I have sealed myself
so not to let you in
so you can
never come
back
so when you douse with me disappointment
as it saturates me I harden like cold candle wax
and I shall stay
(cold that way)
until I am immune to your monsoon
of bullshit
because you are always seasonal
with a long lasting effect
and yet
so oblivious to your reliable disruption
to civil give and take
that makes people
respect each other.
get lost in your lover
go off with your friends
I'll grant you this blessing
with me
you have finally found
your end.
Rest or Restless In Peace
I care not in the least
I'll no longer suffer my hands
to feed your beast.